Ice Blogs: The one where I did a bad.

 

I missed last Friday’s post. I am fully aware that I missed this post. I was fully aware on Friday that I wasn’t posting, and then it just slipped my mind. By the time I realised that I actually hadn’t posted anything it was the weekend and I was busy pretending to have a life.

That’s my memory for you.

And it’s also a lesson. Stop putting things back until later. No time like the present.

In my pretending to function normally and have a life, we went shopping, didn’t get everything we wanted, but it was still a really nice day out, and town was quiet which means from an anxiety point of view it was great! 😀

I even did a bit of writing over the weekend, and took the story to 7000 words and the start of Chapter Three!

Stay frosty.

Ice.

Ice Blogs: Turn to page 394

If I’d started this post this morning, it might be longer, but today I feel like we need to take a moment.

So turn your books to page 394, and raise your wands.

Stay frosty.

Ice.

Ice Blogs: Moving up and moving on

Its no secret that I’m pretty pessimistic. If you’re always looking for the worst it’s harder to be disappointed. Or so I tell myself. But living this way is pretty miserable. Of course it is. It has to be. I spend my time expecting misery and I’m one of those people who believes that what you get out you get back. Not in some massively philosophical sense, but happiness breeds happiness, and therefore by default, misery breeds misery. Good customer service, talking to someone bubbly, getting a smile can put you in a good mood, it can make you feel better about yourself. I know that, it’s my job (customer service), and I’m very good at it, and putting other people in good mood, at making other people feel better about themselves.

And then after work, when I’m tired and on my own and there isn’t anyone for me to please I’m miserable. I don’t mean this in a depression way, although I have my bouts, there are people who are depressed and they have it a lot worse than me, there are people who can’t even manage a fake smile and putting on a face, and that isn’t there fault. My misery is self-induced. Like I said misery breeds misery. And I’m one of those serious, thoughtful people, who over think everything, throw in some anxiety and no self-motivation and you get me.

I can put on a very good front. Anxiety, oddly taught me to do that. I hate fuss over me. If I’m uncomfortable, I play pretend, and I play happy so people don’t know I’m anxious, until I can get to my safe place and do whatever I need to get myself back on track.

That’s why writing is so important for me. It’s allows me a break from my head, from my thoughts, from my misery. It doesn’t matter if I’m writing happy, or dark, or mother fucking disturbing, it takes me out of my head and into someone else’s. It’s escapism, and fortunately it’s cheap(ish) and I’m kind of good at it, making me think that one day my hobby could actually be a paying job.

That’s the dream, huh? A job that one actually enjoys.

I’ve written over 600 words today, and I’m still going so not sure what my total will be until later, but I’m now on chapter two, yay!

Stay frosty, guys and gals.

Ice.

Ice Blogs: And here we are again…

So, it’s Monday, miserable isn’t it?

Here in the east of England, its been dark all day, sunrise was late, and it just didn’t really brighten up. It hasn’t rained (much), but its still been pretty foul.

The weekend flew by, having my folk’s dog, I knew it would. I had responsibility again. Not that I don’t normally, bills and those boring things, but it was nice being relied on again. Luckily she was picked up yesterday, so I wasn’t left sitting home by myself, or coming home to an empty house. And today I’ve been too busy to notice I’m here by myself.

The darts finished at the weekend, very disappointing compared to some of the earlier matches, but we watched it through, and now the snooker is on, something I haven’t watched in years.

I had a great start to writing this week, 569 words done before 11am. Progress!

Stay frosty.

Ice.

Ice Writes: 1-52! Week 35

Week 35: A Splash of Colour

Ice Writes: 1-52! Week 34

Week 34: The Death Clause

Week 33: A Splash of Colour

Ice Writes: 1-52! Week 32

Week 32: White Box

Ice Writes: 1-52! Week 31 Extract!

Against Nature

Extract

‘You don’t belong here.’

‘I have as much right as you to be here.’

‘You think because we share the same blood that you have the right to be here?’

‘No.’

‘Then go back to that hole where you belong.’

Henry removed his jacket, letting it drop to the floor. ‘I have the right because I earned it.’

Ice Writes: 1-52! Week 31

Week 31: Against Nature

Well it has been a while, hasn’t it?

I got hit by some news that floored me for a long time. I spent a lot of time in bed, eating crap, and just hiding from the world. I still have some moments now where I don’t want to do anything but wallow, or where I’m beating myself, but I’m okay (well getting there).

Ice Writes: 1-52! Week 17

It’s only Tuesday and already I don’t know where this week is going.

I forgot to update yesterday. No excuses, I just forgot. I have an update set on my calendar, which I also receive an email about, and I still forgot.